Accidental Courtesy

When I first read about this documentary available on Netflix – Accidental Courtesy:  Daryl Davis, Race & America – I was reminded of the illustration that my friend and mentor Richard Branton gave about trust:  You can’t make someone trust you.  They have to like you first.  You can’t make someone like you, they have to talk with you first.  But, you can start the conversation.[1]

Accidental Courtesy is the story of African American musician Daryl Davis and his avocation to search out and befriend members of the Ku Klux Klan.  He set out to find the answer to the question:  How can you hate me when you don’t even know me?

Davis has perhaps two dozen robes from Imperial Wizards and other Klan members and leaders who have left the Klan and given their robes to him.  As the film points out, not everyone is enamored with this method of outreach – from a senior fellow at the Southern Poverty Law Center to young black activists in Baltimore.  The film does not shy away from opposing views.

The movie starts with a quote from Sen. Robert F. Kennedy from 1966 in Cape Town, South Africa, that should be an inspiration to us all:

Few will have the greatness to bend history itself, but each of us can work to change a small portion of events, and in the total of these acts will be written the history of [each] generation.

Davis asks what good is it if we sit around with a group of like-minded people and criticize racism?  We’re preaching to the choir.  The value – and risk – comes from starting conversations with folks from the different perspectives.

Another pithy Davis quote from the film:  Fear can be overcome.  However, if fear becomes hate, that is harder to overcome.

Always keep the lines of communication open with your adversaries.  If you’re talking, you’re not fighting. 

We’re living in the space age, but some have the mindset of the stone age.

The film is interspersed with clips of Davis performing with some of the greats of his time:  Chuck Berry, especially.  It is an entertaining, thought-provoking, and often disturbing look at a critical issue of our time.

If you have access to Netflix, it’s well worth the watch.

The final quote from the film, from Abraham Lincoln: 

            Do I not destroy my enemies if I make them my friends?

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[1] See the March 9 blog post.